Ashlee off the market!!

Well, I'm a sad panda this morning, kids. Ashlee Simpson is officially off the market.

During a trip to Colorado, Pete Wentz got his Fall Out Boy on, dropped to a knee and asked Ashlee to marry him. And clearly, having not met me yet, she said yes.

And apparently her creepy dad Joe and her mamadukes Tina aren't just happy bout it, but they're frickin ecstatic.

After some rumors, the newly engaged punk rockers said:

We know there has been a lot of speculation recently about Pete and I and
we wanted our fans to be the first to know, because you guys are the best. Yes,
we are thrilled to share that we are happily engaged. Thank you for all of
your support and well wishes - it means the world to us. We consider this to
be a very private matter, but we wanted you to hear it straight from us.

Oh well, guess I'll just have to settle for Jess. Because seriously, there's no way she's going to stay with Tony Romo's goofy ass. Oddly enough, my main competition for her is with fellow Dirt Slinger, Miss Manda...which is quite possibly the hottest thing ever.