Friday, October 31, 2008

Pink poops on Jennifer Aniston...and MORE!!!


Top 10 faces that are so plastic, they don't need a Halloween mask!! (smack)

I hope Joe the Plumber uses his pipes as well as he fixes them. (candy)

Danny DeVito is all about the man-love. (ayyyy)

Were you hoping to be the one that takes Britney's virginity? You have a second chance! (POTP)
Pink drops the verbal hammer on Jennifer Aniston. (gabby)

Hey ER fans! Dr. Mark Greene is BACK!! (bitten)

Kate Moss knocked up?! (yuddy)

New York Yankees' shortstop Derek Jeter at TNA Impact?! (wrestling)

Kevin Smith says the best line ever


I'm really, really fat right now. Fattest I've ever been.I broke a toilet. That's how heavy I am.


Kevin Smith rules.

More Jennifer Hudson updates

I hate that I have to constantly update you on such crappy news, but it's my job. There's a few updates to take care of, so here we go. First off, apparently William Balfour had threatened Jennifer Hudson's family about a month ago, saying he was going to kill Jen's sister Julia and "mess up everyone in the house." This was after William picked a fight with Julia and Jen's brother Jason, but Julia's ex-fiance Jason Peyton ended up kicking William's ass. Obviously, they didn't take his threats seriously.

Police are also saying they believe that Jen's 7-year-old nephew Julian King was alive when he left the house with William after the killings, and was shot and killed inside of the SUV he was found in. That's the only info police are releasing on their findings so far.

Finally, it was announced that a private memorial service will take place on Monday for all three family members. Although the memorial service is private, Jen and Julia have established the Hudson-King Foundation for Families of Slain Victims in honor of their mother Darnell, Jason, and Julian.

If you're interested in sending a donation, here's the address:

Hudson-King Foundation
c/o Abrams Garfinkel Margolis Bergson, LLP
Attn: William L. Abrams, Esq.
237 West 35th Street, 4th Floor
New York, NY 10001

Ashlee Simpson is about to burst


Pete Wentz was On Air with Ryan Seacrest yesterday and spilled the beans on how his wifey Ashlee is doing with the whole pregnancy deal.

I'm permanently on-call right now. She is at the very end, and it could happen at any point now. [She's] excited, she's anxious...I think she wants it to be over. She just wants to not be pregnant any more. She wants to have it because it's, like, a struggle to go up and down the stairs...going out in public's insane. She's hot all the time. She's like 'I wish I was in Canada right now.' Our room temperature is set to, like, 34 degrees. It's insane!"ecause it's, like, a struggle to go up and down the stairs...going out in public's insane.

I'm insanely glad I'm a man, and respect and love the hell out of the girl who will be my wife.

Another old school show returning

A little history lesson. Back in the day on Beverly Hills 90210, Jennie Garth's character Kelly Taylor dated a guy named Jake Hanson, who was played by Grant Show. Kelly and Jake together led to a spin-off called Melrose Place, and since 90210 has come back, it looks like Melrose Place is right behind!

Someone who won't be appearing on the show though is Jennie. She was asked if she would be popping up on the spin-off, but she straight up just said no. Which kinda boggles my mind, because it's not like she's a slated regular on a show now, ya know? She has a contract for a few shows of the new 90210, but nothing season-long.

"Dirty Thoughts" with Bai Ling


"Those scorpion bowls are really kicking my ass."

"Dirty Thoughts" with Geoff Stults


"Yes, her 42-inch long legs are real, and they're SPECTACULAR. Trust me."

"Dirty Thoughts" with John Mayer


"Man, FINALLY Jen is giving me some space. Hellllooooo ladies."

Don't Vote -- The Sequel!!

This shizzle seriously made me laugh out loud a few times, and the last 10 seconds I laughed so hard that I coughed, and coughed so hard while laughing that I saw stars. Check it out!

Tina Fey and Sarah Palin BFF?

You would think that Sarah Palin would be a little hostile toward Tina Fey for mocking her for countless weeks on Saturday Night Live, but that's not the case. Nothing against the Governette, but she just seems like she'd have the opposite of a good sense of humor. But, apparently I was uber wrong.

When Sarah was actually on SNL a couple of weeks ago, she offered to have her daughter Bristol babysit Tina's daughter Alice. Now that was a very kind gesture, don't you think?

But seriously, like Tina Fey would want Sarah's 17-year-old knocked up daughter to spend ANY alone time with Alice. Hell, she'd probably be knocked up herself in the 90 minutes Bristol would be watching her!

The Beatles are reuniting!!!


You read it right! Paul, Ringo, George, and John are all getting back together to rock the world!! Well, sort of. With such huge success from the Rock Band games, Harmonix has decided to bring back one of the most classic bands of all time for their own game -- The Beatles. Reps from Harmonix said that the game won't be part of the Rock Band series, but it will be compatible with the Rock Band instruments. It's slated for a 2009 holiday season release.

That's really all that's known about the game so far, but that's all any Beatles fan needs to know!! Right Santino?

Not celebrity news, but sorta interesting


For those of you that think big corporations don't really care about its clients, think again. Apparently, Brandon Crisp, a 15-year-old kid that lives in Barrie, Ontario, Canada, ran away from his home after his father took his XBox 360 away from him after his attitude started to change from playing Call of Duty 4: Modern Warfare. He hasn't been seen or heard from since October 13. Microsoft (who makes the XBox) has posted a reward of $25,000 for his return. Check out what his dad says about it all.

This is such an issue that hits every parent out there, with video games that are starting to control our kids' lives.

No, I'm sorry Mr. Crisp, but that's bullsh*t. My 14-year-old cousin has that SAME GAME, and his attitude isn't changing. How about instead of blaming a video game console, you own up to your own mistakes. My aunt and uncle are kick ass parents, which is why my cousin still has a good head on his shoulders. Why don't you try parenting your kid a little more instead of looking for someone/something else to take the fall.

Another dancer sick on Dancing with the Stars


Julianne Hough was rushed to the hospital last week following the live broadcast of Dancing with the Stars, and she was diagnosed with endometriosis. It turns out she's not the only one with the illness on the show. Professional dancer (and my new crush) Lacey Schwimmer actually suffers from it too, and at times finds herself feeling weak and light-headed.

What are they putting in the water over there? Damn!

Brad Paisley and Keith Urban work it in the bathroom together


Yup. You heard it here first -- Keith Urban and Brad Paisley like to secretly making beautiful music together in the bathroom. Sadly, that's not even a play on words -- it's actually really true. When the two were invited to play at the Academy of Country Music's annual Christmas party a few years ago, they decided to turn it into a duet, but the only quiet place they could find was a bathroom.

So there we were, sitting against the wall in the men's bathroom at the ACM party working up a duet to play. Now that was really fun.

Hey, whatever floats your boat I guess.

Nicole Kidman emotional over daughter


If you want to meet a proud and happy mother, look no further than Nicole Kidman. Apparently, she's so happy and excited about her daughter, Sunday Rose, that it brings her to tears.

I'm raw and emotional. I cry even thinking of her. But they are tears of joy. Because I suppose I never thought I would get to to have it. To have been given it so late in life -- I'm so ready for it. I think giving birth to a child, as a woman, is what we're born to do. I don't mean that to sound sexist, because many women don't get to do it, and I thought I was one of them. But at the same time, if you are given that gift, it's an extraordinary thing.

Hmm...nothing like admitting that you: 1) Are a fantastic candidate for some pills to calm you down, and 2) Believe women are good for nothing more than popping babies out.

HAPPY HALLOWEEN!!!


Happy Halloween from the Dirt!! Have fun tonight, be safe, and check your apples before you bite into them!

If you're dressing up for tonight, feel free to send your pics to celebritydirt@gmail.com -- we'll post them all, and who knows, maybe we'll even do a little something special for the winner!

Thursday, October 30, 2008

Another former WWE wrestler dead?


Wrestlers and wrestling fans are questioning the whereabouts of former WWE/WCW/ECW wrestler Perry Saturn. He apparently hasn't been heard from in months, and he was nowhere to be seen at Killer Kowalski's funeral a couple of weeks ago. The funeral was in Malden, MA, and Perry is actually from around there. On top of that, apparently the main topic of convo at the funeral was Perry's whereabouts, and some even believed him to be dead.

Rihanna is a sex kitten...and MORE!!!


Britney Spears hittin the dance studio! (smack)

Rihanna is kinky. (candy)

Ali Lohan sucks at Halloween. (ayyyy)

Jennifer Hudson goes into hiding. Poor girl. (POTP)

Joaquin Phoenix quits acting. (gabby)

Paris Hilton for President!! (bitten)

Jennifer Hudson's fiance signed by WWE!! (wrestling)

New Weezer video!

Weezer just dropped their video for their new hit Troublemaker. Check it out!!

Arnold Schwarzenegger supports gay rights


The Governor of California has gone on record and asked the citizens of his state to vote NO on Prop 8, which looks to ban gay marriage. The funny thing is The Governator is a Republican, and normally Republicans support the ban on gay marriage.

Nice to see Arnold go against the flow of the norm. Listen to your Governor, Cali!

New Guitar Hero: World Tour commercial

I've been meaning to post this since Monday, but I'm an airhead and kept forgetting. This is the new commercial for Guitar Hero: World Tour, starring Tony Hawk, A-Rod, Kobe Bryant, and Michael Phelps. I think it's kinda cool when celebrities just let loose and have fun, so I'm a fan of this commercial. Check it out below!

Jackson 5 reunite!!!


You want to talk about boy bands getting back together -- THE VERY FIRST ORIGINAL BOY BAND IS BACK!! The Jackson 5 are hitting the studio, and it's been confirmed that Michael Jackson is in!! Mikey's brother Jermaine broke the news.

This has been a long time coming for the Jackson family to get back together. It is going to be more like a family affair. Janet's going to open and, of course, the original Jackson 5... Michael, Randy and the whole family... we're in the studio, we're planning on being out there next year.

My buddy Stone Cold Steve Austin can sum my excitement up in 3 words.

Janet keeps it clean in Michigan

Janet Jackson decided to cut a segment out of her show last night to say in accordance with Michigan state law that doesn't allow simulated sex acts in a public performing space.

Normally during her segment for Discipline, Janet will take a male fan from the crowd and bring him up on stage, tie him up, and then "molest" him while her dancer simulate different sexual acts, including masturbation. Instead of having to cancel the show all together because of the segment, she just cut it completely.

And it's pretty safe to say if Janet Jackson ever molested me, I'd die a happy Jadder.

Courteney Cox-Arquette lives in a Cougar Town


Fresh off of her hit FX show Dirt, Courteney Cox-Arquette is going to head back to one of the major networks for her own show. ABC has decided to order a comedy pilot where Courteney will play a newly single 40-year-old mother with a 17-year-old son. The show will be called Cougar Town, which will obviously make every man in their 20s want to watch the show. Throwing cougars to fellas my age is like throwing candy to a baby.

Hudson family murder update


Three updates for you all on the whole Hudson family murder situation. The lone suspect that Chicago police have in custody right now, William Balfour (who is Jennifer Hudson's brother-in-law and Julian King's stepfather), has refused to take a polygraph test, which totally reeks of guilt. Police have found a gun a few blocks away from where Julian's dead body was found in the back of the SUV that William was driving. And finally, it's very possible that William had some help. The following is an excerpt from a report. Not sure where the original is from, but I found this on bossip.com.

Security video at the South Side high school showed someone parking the Chrysler on Friday, but investigators have not been able to determine the person’s identity from the images, the sources said. A time stamp on the video showed the car was left there at 12:30 p.m. Friday, but it was unclear whether the stamp was accurate, sources said.

Like we have been since the start, we'll keep you updated on all of the info as we get it.

Zuma Nesta Rock Rossdale makes his debut!!

The newest pride and joy of Gavin Rossdale and Gwen Stefani made his first public appearance with her parents yesterday!!




Someone looks like Mommy!!

See Posh Spice in her underwear!!


Victoria Beckham has decided to follow in the footsteps of her hubby and pose in her underwear for Giorgio Armani's new Emporio Armani underwear campaign. Armani is pumped to have Vicky on board and bareing almost all her goods to promote the line.

Who better than Victoria Beckham to launch our new global Emporio Armani underwear campaign? Victoria is a style icon, a dynamic lady whose influence and recognition will add great excitement to the continued international growth of our Emporio Armani women's underwear business.

I agree with him. Who better to see in her underwear than Victoria Beckham?

Denise Richards' reality show is coming back


E! has decided to re-up on Denise Richards' reality show Denise Richards: It's Complicated and bring it back for a second season. They made the decision and confirmation yesterday. Filming starts up again in a few months.

Honestly, haven't we had enough of this broad? The only reason she's still even in the gossip blogs and limelight is because she tries to drop a big poop on Charlie Sheen whenever she can, but no one really cares about anymore. Well, I know I don't anyway.

"Dirty Thoughts" with Jordin Sparks


"Bitch, I could STILL kick Russell Brand's ass."

Jada Pinkett Smith parenting techniques


Jada Pinkett Smith is featured in the November issue of Cookie magazine and discusses how she and Big Willie Style have raised their children and kept them on the opposite side of bratty and stuck up. She says there's really six main rules they follow.

1. EAT AS A FAMILY
There's flexibility about when they eat breakfast and lunch, but dinner together is sacred."
2. ENLIST HELP
"I'm lucky to have a lot of people in my world who help me "[My mother] travels with me all the time, and when I travel and the kids aren't with me, she stays with them."
3. DRINK WATER
"I tell them, 'You have three bottles of water a day, then drink what you want. I'm always like, 'Listen, we've got to keep our bodies strong -- we got too much stuff to do!'"
4. RESPECT THEIR BOUNDARIES
"Staying out of kids' space can teach them to be responsible for their own decisions and mistakes. Is it their room, or are they borrowing the space while they're living in your house? If it's theirs, then they should be able to do whatever they want with it. If it's their clothes, they have the right to do whatever they want with those clothes. We have to give them some freedom to be who they are."
5. CHOOSE YOUR BATTLES
"Who is it going to hurt, really, if she has orange balloon pants on the red carpet? I try to stay outside my ego and what I want and to respect them as I expect them to respect me."
6. EXPOSE AND EDUCATE
"We go to church as a family on Sunday, but we study world religion during the week as well. We read excerpts from the Bible, from Hindu texts, Kabbalah, Judaism...."

Obviously, Will and Jada are doing something right, because you NEVER hear anything about their kids really, and more often than not, no news is good news.

Patrick Swayze kicking cancer's ass


It's no "Why me?" syndrome with Patrick Swayze when it comes to his pancreatic cancer. The Dirty Dancing star is taking his cancer on full-force and keeping himself very busy at the same time. Patrick sat down with Us magazine for his first interview since being diagnosed.

I just love to work hard. I'm still fine to work. I haven't changed - oh, I have changed, what am I saying? It's a battle zone I go though. Chemo, no matter how you cut it, is hell on wheels. How do you nurture a positive attitude when all the statistics say you're a dead man? You go to work.

And that's where he was when he was first diagnosed -- on the set of his new TV drama filming the pilot. He said he suffered from bad indigestion at first, then he saw more and more symptoms popping up, and decided it was time to get checked out. You really have to admire this guy's attitude though -- instead of wallowing in his own self-pity, he's hitting it twice as hard and wants to make an impact. That's a way to earn respect, my friends.

Tara Reid opens up about botched lipo


After years of getting pooped on by the media because of her botched liposuction, Tara Reid has finally decided to speak out about it in the next issue of People magazine.

It does hurt my feelings, but what can I do? I have to move on.

And she has been moving on by focusing on her clothing line, Mantra. The line includes bikinis, t-shirts, and other casual wear. Good for her I suppose, but the thing I don't understand is if you look like Tara Reid used to (which is why I posted an old school pic of her in a bikini), WHY would you even feel the need to get lipo? She looked GREAT before!

Lee Ann Womack is sorta mentally unstable


During an interview with the Tennessean to plug her new album Call Me Crazy, Lee Ann Womack decided to share the top 10 craziest stuff she's done. Check it out:

Ten Crazy Things I've Done --by Lee Ann Womack:

1. Got knocked up by the "A&R" guy.
2. Called a certain radio station and asked them to please mail the term "country" back to me, since they clearly weren't using it.
3. Spray painted "You've never even heard country music" on the side of a Music Row building.
4. Threatened to "Nancy Kerrigan" a fellow female artist at an awards show.
5. Threatened to fire my entire band for going to bed earlier than I thought was necessary.
6. Made the whole band watch 'Night Calls' on the Playboy Channel with me.
7. Made the whole band read 'To Kill A Mockingbird' and give me a report on it.
8. Recorded 'The Westin Sessions' at the Westin Hotel in Times Square ... a project that included only songs making fun of other artists.
9. Threatened to give a certain Tennessean music critic "three swift kicks to the groin" after he wrote a mostly positive (but not all positive) review of 'There's More Where That Came From.'
10. Voted for George W. Bush ... twice.

This broad seriously sounds like she could be my best friend.


Wednesday, October 29, 2008

Jessica Simpson makes Tony Romo sound like a douche...and MORE!!!


Jennifer Hudson's brother-in-law has served hard time for attempted murder before. Look for his picture next to the word "douchebag" in the next series of dictionaries to come out. (smack)

New Jessica Simpson movie opens at #1...in Russia (candy)

Traci Bingham shows how it's possible for trash to take out the trash. (ayyyy)

Britney Spears hosting Saturday Night Live in November!! (POTP)

Olsen Twins get slammed during book signing! (gabby)

Jessica Simpson throws Tony Romo right under the bus. (bitten)

Another celebrity divorce on the way?! (yuddy)

John Cena and WWE being sued!! (wrestling)

Britney's dad owns her


For a while now, Britney Spears' father Jamie has been in control of her personal and financial affairs -- pretty much ever since she went crazy and was deemed mentally insane by the public.

L.A. Superior Court Commissioner Reva Goetz ruled yesterday to make that set up permanent, which was actually met with absolutely no objection. Britney actually doesn't mind it, and I can't see why she would. It gives her less things to worry about and the ability to focus more on her comeback and being a better mother.

Maybe they should try this "treatment" on Jamie Lynn now.

"Dirty Thoughts" with Kyle Howard (LC's new boyfriend)


"Jesus. I took her to dinner, I paid...when the hell do I get naked with her?!"

Jessica Biel wants to stay plastic-free


Jessica Biel is starting to become more aware and worried of her body aging, but says no matter how old she gets and how many wrinkles end up on her face, she won't get plastic surgery at all.

I am really afraid of blades on my face. That freaks me out beyond belief. I would way rather have wrinkles than have some slice-up going on.

I find that statement funny, considering there was a bunch of rumors that she got her lips done. But notice how she said she's always been afraid of blades, not needles. Hmm...I smell a controversy!

Happy Belated Birthday, Matilda Rose!!


Yesterday was Matilda Rose Ledger's 3rd birthday, and her first without her father Heath. Poor girl...best wishes and Happy Birthday from the Dirt!

T-Pain offers up TMI


T-Pain decided to literally tell-all during an interview with Spin magazine.

I've had a lot of sexual experience in my life. A whole lot. I lost my virginity when I was ten.

Yup, that's about as awkward as having a guy tell me I have a sexy voice today.

"The Ex List" gets axed

You probably know her more from her recurring role on Grey's Anatomy has a disfigured patient who become fond of Dr. Alex Karev, but Elizabeth Reaser recently got her own show on CBS called The Ex List, which just got scrapped by the network after tanking in the ratings.

I was actually surprised to see that she got her own show, because I didn't really think she was big enough to. Her character was pretty popular on Grey's, but she hasn't really gotten much exposure other than that. I just didn't think she had the star power to make it work. You could say that about Grey's, but that revolves around multiple storylines, not just one main one.

Update on the Ugly Betty/Lohan feud


We reported last week that there's a feud a-brewin' between Lindsay Lohan and Ugly Betty star America Ferrera. It all came about when LiLo's guest appearances randomly went from 6 to 4. They said that it was because Lindsay was difficult to work with, but Vanessa Williams is standing up for her, saying she was a pleasure to work with. Turns out it was actually America who had the problem with her, because she didn't like LiLo stealing the limelight.

And that is why America's career won't go far at all. I'll put money down that says once Ugly Betty is over and done with, America will be too.

Selena Gomez not dating Nick Jonas


Selena Gomez confirmed to Us Magazine that she's not dating Miley's ex-boyfriend Nick Jonas.

All the Jonas brothers are wonderful guys. I mean, I have nothing but wonderful things to say about the family. That is definitely for sure. Anyone would be really lucky to be dating Nick. And anyone would be lucky to be dating any of them. I'm not that lucky. I'm not dating him.

In the same article, she told the mag that she adores Miley Cyrus and thinks she's adorable, and also thinks Miley's boytoy Justin Gaston is "really cute." Really cute, huh? Is she going to make a move on ANOTHER one of Miley's men?!

Cloris Leachman news


Cloris Leachman has kicked the bucket. Well, not in life, but on Dancing with the Stars. She was voted off the show last night with her partner Corky (hahahahahaha, his name is Corky) Ballas. But that's not the only story involving Cloris and Dancing.

Rumors were running rampant that Cloris was having MAJOR diva problems with co-host Samantha Harris and fellow contestant Susan Lucci, but the two women told People magazine that the rumors were false and they love having her on the show. Well, loved, since she got eliminated. But seriously, hats off to an 80-something-year-old broad for lasting so long on the show! Especially with a partner named Corky.

Ellen Pompeo's hubby is gonna get some!!


Ellen Pompeo, better known as Meredith Grey from Grey's Anatomy, is officially starting her mid-life crisis. She's 38, still smokin' hot, but worried that she's running out of time to have a baby and that her biological clock is ticking.

Her hubby Christopher Ivery has some work to do! Try Viagra or Viaprin, my friend. Because apparently you've been failing miserably on your own.

Paris heading to space


Paris Hilton is apparently heading into space as a part of Virgin's first spaceflight. She's admitted to being pretty nervous about it.

I'm very scared to do it. What if I don't come back?

Well, if she doesn't come back, it's very possible that Paris could be responsible for the first STD being lost in space.

Jennifer Love Hewitt wants tons of babies?!


Here is what Jennifer Love Hewitt recently told US magazine about her and her fiance Ross McCall:

We're just gonna have lots of babies!

J-Love fans can relax, though. She's only talking about her Halloween costume -- her and Ross are planning on dressing up as Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie. Good thing, too. If people thought she was fat before (which I didn't at all), imagine the backlash she'd get for being pregnant nonstop.

No hate on "The View"


For all you fans of The View who think the ladies actually hate each other (mainly Whoopi Goldberg and Elisabeth Hasselbeck), Whoopi is setting the record straight. She said that there's "no personal digs" amongst the women whenever they're debating a topic on the show. Whoopi has actually said in the past that women aren't like men -- men get in arguments and are pissed for a while, where girls can argue about something and then 5 minutes later go get a coffee together.

Wait, what? I don't know what the girls are like in Whoopi's World, but in reality, most girls (no offense) can't let stuff go within 5 minutes. Like that last sentence, for instance, will probably make me the most hated man in America for at least the next 10 years.

Sophia Bush dating ex-hubby's co-star


I smell a love triangle on the way. It's been confirmed that Sophia Bush, who used to be married to Chad Michael Murray, is now dating James Lafferty. Doesn't seem like a big deal, until you factor in that Chad and James are co-stars on One Tree Hill. But surprisingly, there's no drama and Chad is cool with it.

It's just a little tight group in Wilmington.

Wouldn't that make you even more upset if it's "just a little tight group" and one of your buddies in that group started dating your ex-wife?

David Duchovny comes crawling back

How typical is this -- spouse f*cks up, spouse comes crawling back. Of course, it hasn't been confirmed that David Duchovny cheated on his wife Tea Leoni, but one can only imagine. Either way, Dave is begging Tea to think the separation/divorce over and wants to work things out with her. He blames Billy Bob Thornton for the split, saying that he sent Tea some very sexual text messages.

Oh, David. You checked into rehab for a sex addiction -- no one does that unless they really mess up and want their spouse to forgive them for messing up. Denial and pointing the finger at ole Billy Bob won't help your cause.